Delicious Monster
"It is what it is" + CPU giveaway
Here we have what is probably the all-time worst response by a company spokesperson. When asked to comment on Apple's new desktop being $1000 cheaper than a similarly-equipped Dell, Marco Pena, who claims to be Dell's spokesman is quoted thusly: "The initial price of a computer is not the only cost factor involved; the total cost of ownership includes how productive you are with your machine, how easy it is to support, how often it needs to be serviced, how much these services cost, and myriad other factors. We feel that Dell computers represent the best value for customers over the life of their machines."No, not really. Here's what he really said: "The results were a bit surprising to me, too," he said. "But it is what it is."
IT IS WHAT IT IS? Are you kidding? Seriously, though. It is what it is?
Incredulous, I called Marco myself, to ask him what other responses he'd thought about using but then rejected. After twenty or so minutes of him just saying "Polo," I finally talked him into sending me the following list:
- "Price, shmice."
- "Well, at least our laptop batteries don't spontan... oh, wait."
- "Hah, that's nothing -- you should see how much cheaper Apple's notebooks are than ours!"
- "Really, $1000? Oh man, I'm gonna go grab one of those for my home!"
- "With people dying every day in Iraq, aren't there more important issues you could be covering?"
- "I guess that explains why we've all been ordered to work only two-day weeks."
- "Sure, it's cheaper, but it's not going to run your favorite software... What??? Shit, we're boned."
- "Damn, now I wish I'd taken that job as Bush's spokesman."
- "If you love Apple so much, why don't you marry them?"
In other news, I won an Genuine Intel Pentium Extreme Edition 955+ Hyperthreaded Dual-core Virtualizing CPU at Penny Arcade Expo this year, for which I sadly have no use, since I just sold my Gaming PC in favor of a Gaming MacBook Pro. (Which runs Half-life 2 better, thankyouverymuch.)
The CPU is is supposed to be worth, like, $1,000, and it's still sealed in its original box with a giant heat-sink and everything, and I've decided to give it away to some lucky blog reader.
Rather than have you perform some menial task, I've decided to combine my loves (attention-whore and the environment) and give the CPU to the greenest, gamingest reader out there.
Yup, send me tales of how much you love gaming AND how you're working to save the environment. Do you recycle? Love Elder Scrolls? Compost? Shoot zombies? Re-use? Fight aliens on a space station by Muckyfoot? Have a rain barrel? Use a double-barrel shotgun? Donate money to charities?
Sum it up for me, you could have a shiney new CPU for your rig. (If I don't get any compelling entries I reserve the right to give the CPU to, like, my cat.)
Labels: mac community